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- Becoming more aware of what is going on in their head. Sometimes actually hearing the truth for the first time themselves!
- Putting everything in front of them metaphorically so they can work out what to work on and what to dump. I call it ditch it or deal with it. And it works wonders on “To do” lists too!
- Noticing how everything in their head impacts on them -- physically and emotionally.
- Challenging the beliefs they are holding around their perception of reality.
- Arrange to meet with a friend or colleague and agree that “without judgement” they will listen and not interrupt. Agree that you will donate an hour to enable them to do the same.
- One Facebook friend told me that their “cure to a racing mind” was to “disappear to bed with a pen and notebook to write it all down.” While in theory that is a good idea, I asked them if this worked for them, and they said sometimes. Could that be because they’ve waited until bedtime to process everything and get it out, instead of dealing with it when it was really a problem? Journaling can store up a lot of negative emotion if we keep reading it, so pay attention to how your notes make you feel. Is it really beneficial to you or do you need to change the way you write?
- Make the time to focus. Do you need to put it in the diary or will you natural make the time to do this?
- Create a list of all the things you could do for all the things you have whirling around in your head. Make it a long list. Dismiss nothing.
- Play the ditch it or deal with it game. So often what we think we should be stressing about is actually someone else’s definition of important, therefore ask yourself “does this really matter to me?
With our busy, always on lives, it seems that more and more of us are facing constant tiredness and fatigue on a regular basis.
For many people, they just take this in their stride as part of modern life, but for others the impact can be crippling and can have a serious effect on their sense of wellbeing, health and productivity.
In this article, I’ll share some of the most common causes of constant tiredness and fatigue and give you some guidance and action steps you can take to overcome some of the symptoms of fatigue.Why Am I Feeling Fatigued?
Fatigue is extreme tiredness resulting from mental or physical exertion or illness. It is a reduction in the efficiency of a muscle or organ after prolonged activity.((Oxford English Dictionary: Definition of fatigue))
It can affect anyone, and most adults will experience fatigue at some point in their life.
For many people, fatigue is caused by a combination of lifestyle, social, psychological and general wellbeing issues rather than an underlying medical condition.Although fatigue is sometimes described as tiredness, it is different to just feeling tired or sleepy. Everyone feels tired at some point, but this is usually resolved with a nap or a few nights of good sleep. Someone who is sleepy may also feel temporarily refreshed after exercising. If you are getting enough sleep, good nutrition and exercising regularly but still find it hard to perform, concentrate or be motivated at your normal levels, you may be experiencing a level of fatigue that needs further investigation. Symptoms of Fatigue
Fatigue can cause a vast range of physical, mental and emotional symptoms including:
- chronic tiredness, exhaustion or sleepiness
- mental blocks
- lack of motivation
- muscle weakness
- slowed reflexes and responses
- impaired decision-making and judgement
- moodiness, such as irritability
- impaired hand-to-eye coordination
- reduced immune system function
- blurry vision
- short-term memory problems
- poor concentration
- reduced ability to pay attention to the situation at hand
The wide range of causes that can trigger fatigue include:
- Medical causes: Constant exhaustion, tiredness and fatigue may be a sign of an underlying illness, such as a thyroid disorder, heart disease, anemia or diabetes.
- Lifestyle-related causes: Being overweight and a lack of regular exercise can lead to feelings of fatigue. Lack of sleep and overcommitting can also create feelings of excessive tiredness and fatigue.
- Workplace-related causes: Workplace and financial stress in a variety of forms can lead to feelings of fatigue.
- Emotional concerns and stress: Fatigue is a common symptom of mental health problems, such as depression and grief, and may be accompanied by other signs and symptoms, including irritability and lack of motivation.
Fatigue can also be caused by a number of factors working in combination.Medical Causes of Fatigue
If you have made lifestyle changes to increase your energy and still feel exhausted and fatigued, it may be time to seek guidance from your doctor.
Here are a few examples of illnesses that can cause ongoing fatigue. Seek medical advice if you suspect you have a health problem:Anemia Anemia is a condition in which you don't have enough healthy red blood cells to carry adequate oxygen to the body's tissues. It is a common cause of fatigue in women.
Having anemia may make you feel tired and weak.
There are many forms of anemia, each with its own cause. Anemia can be temporary or long term, and it can range from mild to severe.((NHS Choices: 10 Reasons for feeling tired))Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) is a condition that can cause persistent, unexplained fatigue that interferes with daily activities for more than six months.
This is a chronic condition with no one-size-fits-all treatment, but lifestyle changes can often help ease some symptoms of fatigue.((Verywellhealth: What is chronic fatigue syndrome))Diabetes Diabetes can cause fatigue with either high or low blood sugars. When your sugars are high, they remain in the bloodstream instead of being used for energy, which makes you feel fatigued. Low blood sugar (glucose) means you may not have enough fuel for energy, also causing fatigue.((Everyday Health: Why does type 2 diabetes make you feel tired)) Sleep Apnea Sleep apnea is a serious sleep disorder where sufferers briefly stop breathing for short periods during sleep. Most people are not aware this is happening, but it can cause loud snoring, and daytime fatigue.
Being overweight, smoking, and drinking alcohol can all worsen the symptoms of sleep apnea.((Mayo Clinic: Sleep apnea))Thyroid disease An underactive thyroid gland means you have too little thyroid hormone (thyroxine) in your body. This makes you feel tired and you could also put on weight and have aching muscles and dry skin.((Harvard Health: The lowdown on thyroid slowdown)) Lifestyle-Related Causes of Fatigue
Common lifestyle factors that can cause fatigue include:
- Lack of sleep
- Too much sleep
- Alcohol and drugs
- Sleep disturbances
- Lack of regular exercise and sedentary behaviour
- Poor diet
Common workplace issues that can cause fatigue include:
- Shift work: Our body is designed to sleep during the night. A shift worker may confuse their circadian clock by working when their body is programmed to be asleep.
- Poor workplace practices: This may include long work hours, hard physical labour, irregular working hours (such as rotating shifts), a stressful work environment, boredom or working alone.
- Workplace stress – This can be caused by a wide range of factors including job dissatisfaction, heavy workload, conflicts with bosses or colleagues, bullying, or threats to job security.
- Burnout: This could be striving too hard on one area of your life while neglecting others, which leads to a life that feels out of balance.
Psychological factors are present in many cases of extreme tiredness and fatigue. These may include:
- Depression: Depression is characterised by severe and prolonged feelings of sadness, dejection and hopelessness. People who are depressed commonly experience chronic fatigue.
- Anxiety and stress: Someone who is constantly anxious or stressed keeps their body in overdrive. The constant flooding of adrenaline exhausts the body, and fatigue sets in.
- Grief: Losing a loved one causes a wide range of emotions including shock, guilt, depression, despair and loneliness.
Here are 12 ways you can start tackling the causes of fatigue and start feeling more energetic.1. Tell The Truth
Some people can numb themselves to the fact that they are overtired or fatigued all the time. In the long run, this won’t help you.
To give you the best chance to overcome or eliminate fatigue, you must diagnose and tell the truth about the things that are draining your energy, making you tired or causing constant fatigue.
Once you’re honest with yourself about the activities you’re doing in your life that you find irritating, energy-draining, and make you tired on a regular basis you can make a commitment to stop doing them.
The help that you need to overcome fatigue is available to you, but not until you tell the truth about it. The first person you have to sell on getting rid of the causes of fatigue is yourself.
One starting point is to diagnose the symptoms. When you start feeling stressed, overtired or just not operating at your normal energy levels make a note of:
- How you feel
- What time of day it is
- What may have contributed to your fatigue
- How your mind and body reacts
This analysis may help you identify, understand and then eliminate very specific causes.2. Reduce Your Commitments
When we have too many things on our plate personally and professionally, we can feel overstretched, causing physical and mental fatigue.
If you have committed to things you really don’t want to do, this causes irritability and low emotional engagement. Stack these up throughout your day and week, then your stress levels will rise.
When these commitments have deadlines associated with them, you may be trying to cram in far too much in a short period of time. This creates more stress and can affect your decision making ability.
Start being realistic about how much you can get done. Either reduce the commitments you have or give yourself more time to complete them in.3. Get Clear On Your Priorities
If working on your list of to-do’s or goals becomes too overwhelming, start reducing and prioritizing the things that matter most.
Start with prioritizing just 3 things every day. When you complete those 3 things, you’ll get a rush of energy and your confidence will grow.
If you’re trying to juggle too many things and are multi-tasking, your energy levels will drop and you’ll struggle to maintain focus.
Unfinished projects can make you self-critical and feel guilty which drops energy levels further, creating inaction.
Make a list of your 3 MIT (Most Important Tasks) for the next day before you go to bed. This will stop you overcommitting and get you excited about what the next day can bring.4. Express More Gratitude
Gratitude and confidence are heavily linked. Just being thankful for what you have and what you’ve achieved increases confidence and makes you feel more optimistic.
It can help you improve your sense of wellbeing, which can bring on feelings of joy and enthusiasm.
Try starting a gratitude journal or just note down 3 things you’re grateful for every day.5. Focus On Yourself
Exhaustion and fatigue can arrive by focusing solely on other people’s needs all the time, rather than worrying about and focusing on what you need (and want).
There are work commitments, family commitments, social commitments. You may start with the best intentions, to put in your best performance at work, to be an amazing parent and friend, to simply help others.
But sometimes, we extend ourselves too much and go beyond our personal limits to help others. That’s when constant exhaustion can creep up on us. Which can make us more fatigued.
We all want to help and do our best for others, but there needs to be some balance. We also need to take some time out just for ourselves to recharge and rejuvenate.6. Set Aside Rest and Recovery Time
Whether it’s a couple of hours, a day off, a mini-break or a proper holiday, time off is essential to help us recover, recharge and refocus.
Recovery time helps fend off mental fatigue and allows us to simply kick back and relax.
The key here, though, is to remove ourselves from the daily challenges that bring on tiredness and fatigue. Here's how.
Can you free yourself up completely from work and personal obligations to just rest and recover?7. Take a Power Nap
When you’re feeling tired or fatigued and you have the ability to take a quick 20-minute nap, it could make a big difference to your performance for the rest of the day.
Napping can improve learning, memory and boost your energy levels quickly.
This article on the benefit of napping is a useful place to start if you want to learn more: How a 20-Minute Nap at Work Makes You Awake and Productive the Whole Day8. Take More Exercise
The simple act of introducing some form of physical activity into your day can make a huge difference. It can boost energy levels, make you feel much better about yourself and can help you avoid fatigue.
Find something that fits into your life, be that walking, going to the gym, running or swimming.
The key is to ensure the exercise is regular and that you are emotionally engaged and committed to stick with it.
You could also walk more which will help clear your head and shift your focus away from stressful thoughts.9. Get More Quality Sleep
To avoid tiredness, exhaustion and fatigue, getting enough quality sleep matters.
Your body needs sleep to recharge. Getting the right amount of sleep every night can improve your health, reduce stress levels and help us improve our memory and learning skills.
My previous article on The Benefits of Sleep You Need to Know will give you some action steps to start improving your sleep.10. Improve Your Diet
Heavy or fatty meals can make you feel sluggish and tired, whilst some foods or eating strategies do just the opposite.
Our always on lives have us reaching for sweets or other sugary snacks to give us a burst of energy to keep going. Unfortunately, that boost fades quickly which can leave you feeling depleted and wanting more.
On the other hand, whole grains and healthy unsaturated fats supply the reserves you can draw on throughout the day.
To keep energy up and steady, it’s a good idea to limit refined sugar and starches.
Eating a balanced diet helps keep your blood sugar in a normal range and prevents that sluggish feeling when your blood sugar drops.11. Manage Your Stress Levels
Stress is one of the leading causes of exhaustion and fatigue, and can seriously affect your health.
When you have increased levels of stress at work and at home, it’s easy to feel exhausted all the time.
Identifying the causes of stress and then tackling the problems should be a priority.
My article on How to Help Anxiety When Life is Stressing You Out shares 16 strategies you can use to overcome stress.12. Get Hydrated
Sometimes we can be so busy that we forget to keep ourselves fully hydrated.
Water makes up about 60 percent of your body weight and is essential in maintaining our body's basic functions.
If we don’t have enough water, it can adversely affect our mental and physical performance, which leads to tiredness and fatigue.
The recommended daily amount is around two litres a day, so to stay well hydrated keep a water bottle with you as much as possible.The Bottom Line
These 12 tips can help you reduce your tiredness and feeling of fatigue. Some will work better than others as we are all different, whilst others can be incorporated together in your daily life.
If you’ve tried to make positive changes to reduce fatigue and you still feel tired and exhausted, it may be time to consider making an appointment with your doctor to discuss your condition.
- Dedicate at least one day per week to doing what you love.
- Learn to say no. Try this the next time someone asks you a favor that you really don’t want to deliver.
- Listen to your body. If you feel too tired to go out or even to go to work, skip it and don’t feel bad about it. If you’re a hard worker, most likely you deserve a day off.
- Switch off your phone for an evening or a whole day. Show people that you need some alone time and that they can’t always rely on you.
- Try being selfish for a change. If you are usually the compliant type, try telling others what you prefer or how you want things to happen.
- Apply to be a volunteer in orphanages, elderly homes or animal shelters;
- Join groups or initiatives within your workplace, like office events’ organizers or charity groups;
- Join an organization that fights for environmental issues, advocates animal rights, etc.;
- Be proactive in your neighborhood. Join local initiatives for giving during Christmas and throughout the year.
- Try doing something neither of you has ever done. It can be a new sport, a hobby, a new form of traveling or anything else. Going through new experiences together will bring a fresh excitement and you’ll be able to share how you felt while doing it.
- Try touching each other more often. This may feel forced at first if you are not the typical touchy couple. But there’s proof that hugging and touching your significant other plays a crucial role in nurturing the relationship and helps to avoid and tackle conflicts.
- Give each other time off. This doesn’t mean break up or press “Pause” on your relationship. Simply encourage your partner’s other interests, even when they don’t include you. For example, support their special hobby or encourage a night out or even a trip with his/her friends. The other person will surely appreciate your respect for their interests and you’ll get a chance to miss each other.
- Think with your heart, not your head.
- Ask those close to you what your strengths and weaknesses are.
- Make a list of your own self perceptions.
- Stack your love’s and dislikes against each other.
- Stop playing by the rules.
- Take action(s) daily.
- Test things out and learn.
- Use Mel Robbins 5,4,3,2,1 rule.
- Eliminate negative people from your life.
- Keeping appointments with yourself just like any other (yoga, reading, exercise, cooking….)
- Educate yourself and seek knowledge.
- Eliminate overextending yourself.
- Eliminate frivolous commitments, spending or tasks.
- Do more of what gives you a buzz of excitement.
- Achieve one thing a day towards your goals (passion or purpose)
- If the CEO asks you to provide a report, you are going to make the best report of your life. You understand the opportunity and value of making a good impression with the CEO.
- Now imagine if your coworker asked for the report. Will there be a difference in quality?
- How about if you were going to a class reunion? Would that improve your commitment to get in shape?
- Even when you know you are going to have company over at your house, you are going to clean better than if you knew no one was coming.
We have all felt stuck at some point in our lives. Perhaps you feel stuck right now.
Maybe you’re feeling a little stuck working on a creative project, like writing an article or painting a piece of art. Perhaps you started a new business, took on a major project at work or began a new health or fitness regimen.
Your initial excitement has worn off and you’re now feeling stuck, confused or overwhelmed by how to keep progressing forward. Or maybe, you’re a lot stuck. You feel trapped in a job you hate, a relationship that isn’t working, a boatload of debt, or a life that has little resemblance to the one you'd imagined.
Let’s be honest. Regardless of how stuck you are, it’s a terrible feeling. Feeling trapped and unsure how to move forward can lead to feelings of, confusion, angst, hopelessness, insecurity and overwhelm.
Sometimes we just want to throw in the towel and give up. But don’t give up just yet.
Whether you feel just a ‘little stuck’ or like you’re stuck in dry concrete; trying to make a small or big decision; wondering what you’re doing with your life), feeling trapped in a job, overwhelmed by debt, unhappy in a relationship or life that isn’t the one you want to live, these 10 strategies can help you move forward again.1. Take a step back
Your first step forward when you feel stuck is to take a step back. Often, we try to get unstuck by pushing forward with sheer force or just trying harder. But as Einstein said,
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”
Access a different level of thinking by assessing your current situation from a new viewpoint. Whenever I’m working with clients who feel stuck, this is the first thing I ask them to do.
I have them think about where they are, what got them here and what they really want. When you step back from your life, career, and challenges and look from a bit of a distance, you see things from a different perspective.Your Turn:
Imagine you are lost in the woods. You could keep moving forward looking for your way out. You could panic and go in circles. You could head back the way you came. You could, as I learned in camp, just sit still until help arrives.
Imagine instead that you could stop, take a deep breath and zoom out from your situation. Imagine you could fly above it all as if you were in a helicopter and look down at yourself among the trees.
What could you see or notice differently from this perspective – a different route, people there to support you, the way out is closer than you thought?
Another way to ‘zoom out’ is to look at your situation as a neutral observer. Imagine you’re a fly on the wall watching your life. What insights or advice would you give yourself?((Tracy Kennedy: Taking A Step Back Is The First Step Forward))2. Get specific
It’s hard to move forward until you fully understand why you are stuck. You have to get specific and identify what’s really going on. You must name it to tame it.
A great mentor of mine once said,
“A well-defined problem presents its own solution”.
If you want to find a solution, you must truly understand the underlying problem. This is one of the premises of coaching. When you dig a little deeper to the real issue/challenge/blockage, solutions tend to present themselves.
For example, there are big differences between, ‘I feel stuck’ and ‘I feel stuck because I’m overwhelmed with the details’ or ‘I feel stuck because I’m worried what people are going to think of me.’ Once you name it, you are more likely to be able to tame it.
One of the most important questions I ask clients is, ‘What’s getting in the way?’ When they answer, the next question is always, ‘What else?’ We continue along this route until we feel we’ve gotten to the real, underlying issue(s).Your Turn:
Seek to uncover the underlying issues that are getting in your way and stopping you from progressing. You can do this by journaling, talking to someone who knows you well, or simply taking the time to ask yourself these questions.
Once you name it, perhaps the solution will then present and tame itself.3. Reconnect to your ‘why’
Feeling stuck is often because you’ve lost sight of the bigger picture and what’s important. You’ve lost your why.
Why did you start this in the first place? What reasons, values or passions drove you to make this change in your life? What picture do you have for yourself, your business and your life? Why are you wanting to achieve or accomplish this?
By reminding yourself of your original intention and purpose, it gives you the intrinsic motivation to get back on track and move ahead.
Connecting to your deeper ‘why’ will be the fuel that keeps you going, even through tough times and roadblocks.Your Turn:
Whatever you’re stuck on right now, grab a journal and ask yourself, “Why is this important to me?” ,”Why did I start this in the first place?” “What am I trying to achieve here and why is that important to me? "4. Brainstorm Your Options
We often feel stuck because we don’t see any way out from our current situation - we feel we don’t have any options.
By brainstorming ideas and possibilities, you expand your mind and open your thinking to finding a new solution. When you can see potential options, you won’t feel so trapped anymore.
This is not about deciding the one thing or making the right choice, it’s about allowing your creative mind to expand and see all the potential possibilities. We often dive straight into finding the right one and eliminate anything that doesn’t feel perfect.
That’s why so many people feel stuck. They are attempting to find the next right career, the best way to handle a situation or the one perfect idea. This can lead to a lot of stress and analysis paralysis.
The reality is that there is no single best or right. There are many possibilities that could work for your situation. It’s about the next step right now.
If you hate your career, what new potential careers are on your mind? List them all out - even the ones that seem unrealistic or silly.
If you’re unhappy in your relationship, what can you do? There are likely a lot more options than you’ve considered. What are they?Your Turn:
Make a list of options for your current situation – as crazy or ‘out there’ as they might be.
When you think you’ve thought of everything, ask yourself, ‘What other options are there?' This allows you to dig deeper and see ideas you might not have otherwise explored.
Then, and only then can you start to identify the way forward.5. Take a brain break
Full disclosure, I’m stealing this strategy from my 7-year-old daughter's second-grade teacher.
The other night I was helping my daughter with homework, she was getting super frustrated and wasn’t sure what to write in a letter to her big buddy. She was on the verge of tears when she looked up and asked, ‘Mom, can I take a brain break?’ She got up from the table, walked downstairs to her room and played with her stuffed animals. When she came upstairs a short time later, she was as happy as could be and jumped right into her writing.
We could all use a brain break when we’re stuck. A chance to shift focus gives our brains a chance for quiet; it takes the pressure off so we can come back with a fresh mind and new perspective.
When we take a brain break, it refreshes our thinking and helps us discover another solution to a problem or see a situation through a different lens. The brain break actually helps to incubate and process new information.((Edutopia: Energy and Calm: Brain Breaks and Focused-Attention Practices))
A great brain break is to do something physical that gets you in flow. Take a hike, a run, a walk around the block. Another well-known brain break is meditation - which has so many proven benefits I can’t even begin to name them all. Try it, it works.
I have one friend who says taking a shower helps her get unstuck. ’Somehow good thoughts come up in that silent space.’Your Turn:
What kind of brain breaks can you give yourself? Which would be most helpful? It’s not just for second graders anymore.6. Let go of what’s not working
Have you ever walked through the mud and had your boot get stuck and your foot fly out? When this happens, you usually have two choices: either put your boot back on and keep plodding through, repeating the frustration as it continually gets stuck, or you can take off that boot and move forward.
The same is true in life. When we get stuck, we often stay in the mud and try to drag our boot along. We keep doing what’s clearly not working. The boot represents limiting beliefs, old habits, or stories you’re telling yourself.
Remember in the movie “UP” when Mr. Fredricksen is trying to get his house to fly? It was too heavy. He had to dump out his belongings until the house was light enough to lift off.
Same is true here; you’ve got to get rid of the emotional baggage you’re carrying so you can move forward and fly.
Take my client *Lucy for example. She was stuck trying to figure out what she wanted next in her life and career. She was having trouble finding a job she was interested in. Through our work together, we uncovered that Lucy had an interesting belief: that having a job and being happy were mutually exclusive.
She believed she couldn’t have a job and be happy at the same time. This meant she was either going to be jobless and joyful or employed and miserable. In order to move forward in her career search, she needed to take off this ‘boot’ and believe she could find a job where she could, in fact, be happy.Your Turn:
What’s holding you back? An old habit, limiting belief or story you are telling yourself? How can you reframe your thinking in order to change the direction you are headed?7. Know what you need to get unstuck
We all have a way in which we operate that is unique to us. When you understand how you’re wired, you can understand more specifically what you need to get unstuck. It’s like your own personal formula for moving forward.
For me, I need a crystal-clear picture of what I’m trying to achieve and a big, tangible goal to reach for. When I don’t have a clear picture of the end result or challenging target I’m trying to hit, I feel stuck and demotivated.
Here are some common needs:
Astep-by-step plan, to understand why something is important, deadlines and impending pressure, unconditional encouragement and support, to think things through, connecting to a deeper meaning, freedom, and flexibility, and certainty.
Do you relate to any of these?Your Turn:
What do you need to get unstuck? If you’re not quite sure, you might want to check out the I.D.™ (Instinctive Drives™). It’s a tool I’ve used for almost 20 years (and have all my clients take). It helps you understand what you need to be at your best, including what will help you get unstuck.8. Shift your state
When you’re in a stuck state, it actually creates a cycle of ‘stuckness.’ Get yourself out of there!
Instead of placing all your focus and energy on the problem, shift your focus and energy to another area of your life. Go do something that brings you joy; spend time with someone you love.
Do anything to shift your state and mood. This will switch your downward cycle of ‘doom and gloom’ into an upward cycle of ‘hope and possibility’.
A great way to shift your state is to practice gratitude. So, you hate your job. Practice gratitude for other areas of your life. Does it support your family? Allow you to work remotely?
I'm not saying you should stay in a job you hate, I’m just recommending that you get perspective. A state shift brings energy, hope, and positivity into your mindset…keys to getting out of that dreaded stuck cycle.Your Turn:
What always puts you in a good mood? What brings you joy, happiness or fulfillment? Do it! And make sure to practice gratitude. Try this: each morning for the next week, write down three things you are grateful.9. Take action
Getting into action is critical to getting unstuck. There’s no substitute for momentum. Action enables further action, while inactivity creates inertia, self-doubt, and confusion.
I love this quote from Simon Sinek:
‘If we think of everything we have to do, we feel overwhelmed. If we do the one thing we need to do, we make progress.’
My client *Marcus had just made a career move and was setting out to start his own wellness business. The biggest problem getting in his way? Inertia.
The more he thought about what he was going to do, the bigger the endeavor began to feel. The more he explored the risks, challenges, and his extensive to-do list, the more he felt overwhelmed. He was stuck.
However, once he took action, starting with quick wins, he gained momentum and was able to move forward and tackle bigger and more challenging steps. Once he broke through his inaction, he was on a roll.
My grandfather always told us: a path leads to a path. We can’t know what the future holds and trying to figure out everything before we start is a recipe for disaster.
Know that a path will lead to a path, a step will lead to the next step, but you have to start walking first.Your Turn:
What’s the next step you can take to move forward? Where is there a quick win?
When you think about your first (or next) step, keep it small and achievable to get the momentum going.10. Reach out for help
This summer, my Dad took his new truck and my twin daughters on a trip to the Oregon sand dunes. Only a few minutes into the adventure, they got really stuck. They tried shoveling sand and getting out on their own, but they couldn't. Nearly an hour later, (which felt like an eternity stuck in the middle of a pelting sandstorm), a little dune buggy came along. My Dad’s truck was six times its size, but all they needed was a little pull. They hooked up the wench and within minutes, they were free.
We can all use a little help when we’re stuck. This might be talking to a good friend who knows and understands you or reaching out to get advice from someone who’s been in a similar situation to yours.
Maybe it’s hiring a coach who will ask powerful questions to help you see things from a different angle, a therapist who can uncover hidden roadblocks or a consultant to share opinions and experiences.
When you’re on your own, it can feel hopeless, overwhelming and just plain impossible. But, just a little push or pull from someone can quickly change your trajectory.
While this may seem like one of the easiest strategies, it is actually one of the hardest to do. Why? Even though we are biologically wired to help each other, many of us find it challenging to reach out.
There’s a reason for this:((Quartz at Work: The reason it’s so hard to ask for help))
‘Asking for help exposes us to numerous possible social threats, which is why it’s so uncomfortable. It can feel like a tacit admission of weakness, which lowers our status, and can be an invitation for scorn. It creates uncertainty, and invites the possibility of rejection.’Your Turn:
Who is your dune buggy? Who can you reach out to ask for help right now?
Not ready to reach out to someone just yet? Maybe you can try asking the universe. Some call this prayer, others spiritual guidance, others faith. Whatever you call it, reach out to someone, somewhere, somehow…now.Afraid to ask for help? Here's how to change your outlook to aim high! Bonus: When all else fails, be patient
Sometimes when we’re stuck, we just need to practice patience. Patience that the answer is coming; the shift is going to happen. Patience that you’ve done all that you can and now, it’s time to wait and see what comes back to you.
I’m not suggesting you wait for months or years; but sometimes we expect things to change quickly, yet things take time. This is especially true for big life decisions and transitions or when there are others involved, like your relationships or job.
I love the line from Max Ehrmann's’ Desiderata:
’…whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.’
Trust the unfolding and know that sometimes it may take a little longer than you'd like.
There’s usually a good reason, even if you can’t see it. Maybe it’s not time to move forward or make changes just yet. Maybe you don’t have all the information you need, and when you do, you’ll quickly make progress. Maybe you’re actually stuck where you need to be right now.
When I was in my most recent major career transition, feeling stuck and wondering if I would ever figure out my next step, this quote from Chinese Philosopher Lao Tzu was exactly what I needed:
‘Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving till the right action arises by itself?’
Stay strong. Be patient. The more stuck you are, the greater the freedom will feel.
You’re going to be okay. It won’t always be like this. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. Hang in there and trust the process. Your breakthrough is coming.Final Thoughts
Which of these strategies feel like they will work best for you and your current stuck situation?
You don’t have to use all of them, it just takes one.
Remember, any movement, momentum or shift will help get you unstuck and moving forward again. Besides, it's never too late to start things over! Here's the proof:How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late
- How mum feels about going through such a major life-changing event.
- How mum views herself including negative perceptions about physical changes, such as weight gain, swollen breasts, and other discomfort.
- The restrictions to mum's lifestyle that motherhood might incur.
- How mum's partner or family feel about the baby.
- How depression during pregnancy could impact relationships.
- Difficulties with previous pregnancies.
- Lack of energy and extreme fatigue
- Feeling emotionally detached
- Chronic anxiety
- Feeling isolated and guilty
- Inability to concentrate and difficulty remembering
- Feeling emotionally numb
- Extreme irritability
- Sleeping too much or not enough, or restless sleep
- Desire to over eat, or not eat at all
- Weight loss/gain unrelated to pregnancy
- Loss of interest in sex
- A sense of dread about everything, including the pregnancy
- Persistent sadness
- Inability to get excited about the impending birth
- Inability to feel a bond with the growing baby
- Thoughts of suicide, or death
- Postnatal depression is less severe than other types of depression? In fact, it's as serious as other types of depression.
- Prenatal depression is not possible due to hormonal changes? In fact, those hormonal changes can contribute.
- Postnatal depression is entirely caused by hormonal changes? It's actually caused by many different factors.
- Postnatal depression will soon pass? Unlike the "baby blues", postnatal depression can persist for months if left untreated. In a minority of cases, it can become a long-term problem.
- Postnatal depression only affects women? Research has actually found that up to 1 in 10 new fathers become depressed after having a baby.
- Prepare your coffee or favorite tea
- Enjoy watching a bird in a tree during lunch
- Have a conversation at work
- Wait in line (Why not make the most of that popcorn line at the cinema?)
- Hang a picture
- Tie your shoes
- Microsoft Excel
- Microsoft Access
- Data Analytics
- Adobe Campaign
- XML Database management system
- Filemaker Pro
- RDBMS (Relational Database Management System)
- Content Management System (CMS)
- Google Analytics
- Cascading Style Sheets (CSS)
- Email Marketing
- Web Page Design
- Digital Media
- Search Engine Optimization (SEO)
- Campaign Management Software
- Adobe Photoshop
- Adobe InDesign
- Adobe Illustrator
- Microsoft Visual Studio
- Microsoft Word
- Microsoft Publisher
- Operating Digital Cameras
- CISC and RISC architecture
- Embedded Processor Hardware Design
- Memory Management
- PCB Layout
- Backup management
- End User support
- Client-Server management
- Installation and configuration
- Issue tracking system (ITS)
- System administration
- Tech support
- Duolingo - Duolingo app will improve your spoken and written communication skills in different languages. With the magic of gamification added to the study, the app will make learning a fun and addictive task.
- Hemingway - Hemingway app defines the length, complexity, and common errors associated with the sentences. In this way, it helps you to write effectively and go ahead in the career.
- Udemy - The Udemy, with its 2000+ courses, is a great platform to master new skills, advance your career and explore the newer technologies and programming languages. Enrol a course as per your budget and make a brighter future.
- eDX - eDX is yet another commendable platform you can look forward to. The platform offers you the best of the tutorials prepared by the business professionals and technology experts, ensuring a great boost in your computer skills.
- Excel Easy - Excel Easy, as the name depicts, will make working with Excel easier for you via their detailed tutorials and 300+ real-life examples.
- GCF LearnFree.org - It is a one-stop platform for accelerating your future in the computer world. From graphic design to Microsoft Office, resume writing, enhancing adaptability, and much more, the top experts will guide you with everything on this platform.
- QuarkXPress - The QuarkXPress will aid you to add soul to your design with its unparalleled collection of font style, size, and typography. The best part is that it is avails all the options in different languages, including English, Spanish, German, French, and Italian to name a few.
- Work and life balance - The last thing you’d want is a job that forces you to work 60+ hours each week. Unless this is the type of environment you’d want. Understand how your potential employer emphasizes work/life balance.
- Self-development opportunities - Having the option to grow within your company is important. Once you learn how to do your tasks well, you’ll start becoming less engaged. Choose a company that encourages employee growth.
- Company culture - The stereotypical cubicle job where one feels miserable doesn’t have to be your fate. Not all companies are equal in culture. Take, for example, Google, who invests heavily in keeping their employees happy.((Neil Patel: Inside Google’s Culture of Success and Employee Happiness))
- Benefits: formal standards, wide selection of curricula, same pace as peers, short-term friendly
- Drawbacks: expensive, inflexible, time consuming, parent can get easily burnt out
- Resources: K12, Time4Learning, Abeka
- Benefits: well-proven (used for thousands of years), adaptable, focus on logic and critical thinking, systematic and organized, reading is a high priority, language learning (classical or modern), easy to find others to network with
- Drawbacks: less experiential/interactive learning, impracticality of learning classical languages, heavy focus on reading is time consuming and can be overwhelming, inflexibility in framework
- Resources: The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide to Classical Education, Well Trained Mind, What is Classical Education, The Classical Curriculum
- Benefits: promotes thinking about concepts as a whole, not monotonous or redundant, student-directed, bolsters weaker subject areas, beneficial for teaching multi-age students
- Drawbacks: incomplete, knowledge gaps, curriculum-dependent
- Resources: Unit Study, Unit Studies, Unit Studies Made Easy, Konos
- Benefits: inexpensive, journaling rather than tests, nature walks, well suited for elementary age, compatible with unit study and classical methods
- Drawbacks: not well suited for middle and high school, little emphasis on math and science, modern material not available
- Resources: A Charlotte Mason Education, A Charlotte Mason Companion, Simply Charlotte Mason, Ambleside Online
- Benefits: tactile learning style, highly adaptable (special needs, gifted), well-suited for elementary age learning
- Drawbacks: teaching certification required, unstructured, not as effective for middle and high schoolers
- Resources: How to Raise an Amazing Child the Montessori Way, American Montessori Society, Living Montessori Now, The Absorbent Mind
- Benefits: extremely adaptable, driven by the passion of the students, multi-dimensional learning, embraces each student’s diversity
- Drawbacks: lack of structure, little guidance for parents to follow, potential knowledge gaps, difficult to assess comprehension and progress
- Resources: Unschooling Rules: 55 Ways to Unlearn What We Know About Schools and Rediscover Education, Unschool RULES, The Master List of Unschooling Resources
- Benefits: flexible, available resources, adaptable to individual students’ needs and learning styles
- Drawbacks: too many options, combination of incompatible methodologies
- Resources: Eclectic Homeschooling, Think Outside the Classroom: A Practical Approach to Relaxed Homeschooling, The Relaxed Art of Eclectic Homeschooling
- International Children’s Digital Library
- Open Library
- World Public Library OverDrive
- Project Gutenberg
- Kindle Unlimited
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Werde Lebensunternehmer oder helfe anderen dabei, es zu werden!
Sie möchten weitestgehend frei über Ihre Lebenszeit verfügen und Ihre Fähigkeiten, Ihre Neigungen, Ihre Kreativität (Phantasie) und Ihre Gefühle bestmöglich ausleben?
Sie möchten Ihre eigenen Ideen realisieren, vielleicht sogar von zuhause aus arbeiten und sich ein Einkommen erwirtschaften, das Ihren Lebensunterhalt sichert.
Sie möchten langfristig gut und deshalb im Einklang mit der Natur leben?
Neben einer vereinfachten Lebensweise spielt dabei auch die moderne Technik eine wichtige Rolle.
Wir finden heraus, wie Sie einfacher leben und die aktuellen technischen Möglichkeiten optimal nutzen können.
Beispielsweise bietet sich zur Fortbewegung in den Städten das Car2go- oder Car-Sharing-Konzept an oder wie wäre es in Zukunft mit einer AllinOne-Solaranlage zur weitestgehend autarken Stromversorgung oder verbrennen Sie Biomasse (z. B. Kuhmist) und erzeugen Sie so Ihren eigenen Strom.
Sie möchten sich mit Ihrer eigenen Stimme an den gesellschaftlichen Entscheidungen, die Sie interessieren, beteiligen ?
Möglicherweise wünschen Sie sich insgeheim schon lange, so zu leben und entsprechende Erfahrungen und Erkenntnisse zu sammeln.
Ja, wie wäre es, wenn Sie Ihre Begeisterung für diese ganzheitliche Lebensweise sogar zu Ihrem Beruf machen und sie auf diesem Wege, Ihr Wissen mit anderen teilen und anderen Menschen helfen können, erfüllter zu leben.
Verwirklichen Sie doch Ihren Traum! Werden Sie ein ganzheitlich denkender Lebensunternehmer oder falls Sie das schon sind, geben Sie Ihr Wissen weiter und geben Sie so Ihrer Zukunft ganz neue Perspektiven!
Verdienen Sie mit Ihrer selbst gewählten Aufgabe Ihren Lebensunterhalt.
Sie können als Lebensunternehmer-Coach Ihr Wissen weitergeben oder aber auch als Coachee, die ganzheitliche Denkweise der Lebensunternehmer kennen lernen.
Natürlich können Sie auch nur einzelne Schwerpunkte aus dem Lebensunternehmer-Konzept trainieren bzw. coachen, etwa den Workshop wo es darum geht für Berufsanfänger und Berufswechsler den optimalen Beruf bzw. die Lebensaufgabe zu finden.
Für die Teilnahme sind keine besonderen Schulabschlüsse oder Zertifikate erforderlich!
Wichtig ist, daß Sie von Ihrem Thema begeistert sind und gerne lernen bzw. später als Lebensunternehmer-Coach Ihre Erfahrungen und Erkenntnisse leidenschaftlich gerne an andere weitergeben.
Ja ich möchte:
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eBooks über Insel-Solaranlagen und Windräder und Solarkollektoren, die man umweltfreundlich und Ressourcensparend aus Schrott, Altmetall und Abfällen bauen kann
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